Asking Yourself the Right Questions

I am learning a lot at my age (I won’t hide it, 39) which is still quite good considering many people go through a lifetime in complete blindness, hitting brick walls and riding roller coasters for years on end.

I know how difficult it is to learn and grow. If I had one wish, I would want it for me to be able to teach teens (including my own kids) how to be happy. And that is why I started this category in my posts. I view learning young as an important element in reaching our goals… Maybe the age old saying “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks” is somewhat true in this case;  if someone hasn’t learned the basics, it is difficult to teach them later in life once they have collected a heavy load of baggage. They may still learn, but it won’t be as easy. So I am a real advocate to teaching early in life. Teenage years are a wonderful age to start learning how to grow in a healthy balanced way.

So if you are a teen or know a teen, try the following. (Adults can try this too)

My first suggestion is to ask yourself the right questions. This will allow you to put yourself in the right / positive  mind-frame. Here are some examples:

- What do I need to do to get good grades?

- What do I need to do to organize my time to fit in work and play?

- What are the wonderful things about myself that people love? (this is not to set goals but to feel happier)

All these questions are positives. There are no negative terms in there. They also are pretty open ended allowing you to get creative in answering them. The best way to answer these questions is in a journal. You will be surprised at the answers you will come up with. Commit to writing at least a full page to answer each question, one question a day. See where that leads. Don’t stop at one page if your hand keeps going…

When you write in a journal, you can always go back and see what you wrote. This is a great way of evaluating where you are now after you have tested some of the items on your list. You guessed it…! You have to test them…

Let’s say you wrote that you have to study at least one hour per evening to get better grades. Test this item on your list for at least 3 exams or 3 weeks. After your testing period, see how well your idea worked. If it worked, great! You have a solution that you have tried and tested that can now be fully implemented. Go back to your journal and write about how happy you are that you acomplished something that was really important to you. You can now pass to the next item on your list. Don’t forget to continue what you started with the first item!

If your testing period to get good grades didn’t work, go back to your journal. Write about your test to see why it didn’t work. Maybe you weren’t able to test properly, you didn’t actually sit down and study for an hour each day, maybe you were studying in front of the TV and this is something you might want to eliminate? and so on. Be honest in your journal; after all it is for your eyes only.  Decide to follow your own suggestions to yourself after you write as well. Action is an important part of changing your ways for success.  Then test again!

Write to me about your testing experiences! I would love to have the opportunity to discuss and help you get better at reaching your goals!

PS: It gets easier over time and each successful testing motivates you to do more. So keep at it, it’s worth it!

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